The new science of golf
Quantum theory is based upon a paradox: The more precisely you can
describe where an electron is, the less certain can you be about its speed
and direction. Conversely, the more precisely you can describe the
electron's speed and direction, the less certain can you be about its
Sounds like golf, doesn't it.
The more you try not to hook a shot, the more it will hook.
The further left you aim (if you are a right hander) the further right your ball will travel.
The more solidly you strike a putt, the further off your intended line
it will travel. Line up the putt perfectly… and it comes up inches
There is more to this. Electrons don't really move, they jump. Their
motion can be described as a wave, but they are particles.
Could this help explain why the first perfectly struck shot of the day
invariably hits a tree branch, or is knocked down by a gust of wind; or
finds a water hazard where there hadn't been one before?
This is the Quantum Theory of Golf. And those who play the game are
Quantum Golfers. Quantum golfers are guided by one immutable truth: where
their golf ball ends up is not attributable to their effort. The quantum
golfer swings. With any luck at all, a few seconds later his ball
appears in a location (hopefully where he can find it).
Quantum golf is a life time pursuit in which the quantum golfer
attempts to conquer the natural instinct to believe that his effort has
something to do with the final resting place of his golf ball and achieve
the total certainty of knowledge that he does not hit his golf ball. He
swings. His ball appears somewhere (hopefully insight) and he goes to that
new location and swings again.
Of course the ultimate state of the quantum golfer would be to not
swing at his golf ball at all. But a compromise to convention is made and
so the quantum golfer "pretends" to play the game - all the time
knowing that the result is an act of quantum randomness.